Thursday, October 1, 2015

Getting Over the Jitters

Every now and then I am asked to give back to the community for all that I have taken away. It happens to us all. There's something that some of us forget in these "all eyes on me" times. Each one of us started somewhere. With me, it was a series of lies, damned lies, and mild obfuscation. I had a help desk gig I managed to parlay into a security career. Now, the Ferraris  and Lambos promised to me by scorpion and every other CBS crapfest haven't exactly manifested yet, but I have some hope for the future.
I was asked to do a small pep talk for a group of students going through a coding bootcamp. I'm leaving their name out since I haven't asked for permission to single them out as a beacon in a vast sea of talent-pool regenerative darkness. Plus, I curse a lot and have a generally shitty attitude on several aspects of our field; mostly things I have to put up with regarding outreach and spreading the love.

In performing this public speaking task I noticed I was much more on-point than in the past, without really prepared notes. I had a general idea of what I wanted to touch upon, but nothing incredibly detailed. People want to hear what is going to help them regarding their careers versus some nuanced view on security. I can speak to both, however I like to give the folks what they want. The way I got over my typical jitters, though, was by doing a few open mics at a local comedy club.

Nothing gets you more nervous than trying to make it through a hack bit, in front of the surliest and most critical individuals on Earth; stand-up comics. Bombing is one of the worst feelings on the planet; especially when no one knows who you are with NO respect for your previous accomplishments. You are just a face, on a stage, with a mic, talking to the masses. For extra points, try telling a racial joke in these PC times. The amount of sweat pouring out of you due to stress, and some serious stage lights, is incomparable.

Slowly, I started to notice a small part of my nerves lifting. I was quicker on my responses to an audience. My flow was better. The points I made were more cohesive. I even managed to moderate myself for a more cultured audience. Everything simply worked better.

Long story cut extremely short, find your local Giggles/LOL/Chuckle-hut and crank out some jokes. Make them as un-PC as possible. Get out of that comfort zone. After all, most of them prohibit cameras so there's no Youtube to worry about.

xoxo,
vesh

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