Wednesday, June 24, 2015

UnlinkedIn and Jobs' Quotes

My only social network is LinkedIn. I am not a fan of Facebook and I fail at Twitter. LinkedIn, though, has a different purpose. It's a near necessity for the "I may want a job/client/investment in the future" crowd. By and large, I have fun with it. I post technical material too - you look at my blog from LinkedIn; I have the data. I get a nice pretty map of all of the countries where your IPs originate. Do you think I want to configure that crap myself? Hell no. I have fake Steve Jobs quotes to post. Ain't nobody got time for that. However, I like to be funny from time to time. If I were a pretentious butthole, I would say I am trying to contribute to the Zeitgeist.

Steve Jobs image macros, complete with inspirational quotes, are the adult equivalent of when you would put a phrase or vague allusion on your AIM away message or profile. Do you honestly think someone is going to see "your" Jobs quote and go, "Holy shit. Apparently everyone is innovating. I better start doing that." This is an update that requires absolutely no thought at all other than purloining someone else's idiotic sentiment via Google Image Search. You may as well go find a picture of Artie Lange and plaster on it some spew from your Marketing 101 course. Since I am a huge Artie Lange fan, I will support your efforts in spite of my previous statements. My blog, so I get to be a hypocrite when I want to.

The macro-calypse (trademark, vesh's Shenanigans Inc.) is just barely better than the "Like" deluge. I make a post which requires feedback, and then oodles of you only hit the "Like" button!?! I want your opinion, dammit! This is the one point in my life I am taking time out to care what you actually think and all I get is a bunch of "I like that you asked" BS? If you do not care, just ignore the post. Move, along. Nothing to see here. It is a very simple process. At least hit the Dislike button to tell me to go screw. The Dislike button is a stance against something. It runs the risk of confrontation, which can also be awesome.

Taking the thoughts of someone else, quotes or otherwise, is some Facebook-type garbage. I wouldn't support it there either though. There are times that a FB repost of something hilarious is called for. I have yet to see a need for inspirational-business quote reposts. There are infinite combinations of things which make a good joke, but there are about 5 decent re-phrasings of "Think Different" in the world.

If you feel the urge to post the quotes of someone else, using a macro that you didn't make, just remember the following. The morons who use Meme Generator are wittier and more original than you. Yes, the guy who takes a "Scumbag Steve" picture and puts on it remarks about his mooching neighbor is more clever than you. So, the next time you decide to post, please "Think Different". Make your own contribution. Put your own flavor to it. Be a Louis CK, not a Carlos Mencia.

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